Fault- Part One

The car sped through the rain. A girl sat inside. Her hair was soaking, stuck to her face as she concentrated on getting home. This girl was named Bell. She was beautiful and sweet, unaware of what was coming.

A phone call. Her phone lit up illuminating her purse. A name she didn't recognize, Avery Smith. She turned back forward ignoring the call, but the ringing continued. On and on and on. It would stop only to begin again. She leaned over to grab her phone and turned the steering wheel with her. Her car flipped. Her world was disoriented.  Left, right, up, down, then red. Among the shattered glass and the crimson pool of blood, the phone was still ringing. Its light shining through the empty night. Finally, it stopped for good. It served its purpose. It brought death upon Bell.

  I am that it. My name is April, and I am a monitor. People have certain paths that they must follow and I can see them. If someone fails to follow their’s; I enforce it. Bell was supposed to die in a car crash here. She followed her path perfectly, but her boyfriend didn't spike her drinks. So I had to kill her. It will still change the path of life, as she died differently. However, if she lived she would cause chaos in ways she couldn't imagine at this point in her mortal life.
I'm not pleased with what I do to people. I was alive once and knew the pain. I know it is necessary though. I can see what happens if even one person messes up. It’s like a play and I’m the director. It’s almost like I’m a god, a god of death.

I lower my head as I see red and blue flashing lights ahead of me. I’ve kept the form I died as and will retain it for the rest of my days here. I look like a silly teenager, a delinquent one too. Although I’ve gotten new clothes over the ages my hoodie is never far from me. My mom gave it to me the day I died.

“You the kid who called the police?” I was used to this by now. I looked up and nodded.

“I was walking over there and I heard the glass break,” I said calmly, “I understand you’ll probably have to question me about what happened.” He nodded and I followed him.

“Name?” He said pulling out his laptop so he could access my files. I flashed him my fake school ID that said my real name. “April Noble. You have definitely witnessed a lot of death, and although you have no real criminal record, I’ll have to take you in.” I was used to this. After my first few times monitoring I got used to the fact that the police would know me.

We stepped into the station and I waved at the secretary. After dying, my emotions have been strained. I can still feel some, but I don’t have strong emotions anymore.

“Welcome back!” She said, “You do seem to witness a lot of bad things.” I grimaced and nodded. I hated what I had to witness. When I was alive, I had a weak stomach and stuff I see every day now would have made me throw up. Now, it’s a part of my life. My job is to make people die. Part of this job is that I’ll never go to whatever heaven there is. I will be stuck here forever. Even if the world is destroyed, I cannot be harmed. I will be stuck, floating around in the empty abyss of space forever.

I shook my head. Now was not the time to be thinking of such tragic things. I followed the cop to an empty interrogation room. Since I was not officially a suspect he didn’t handcuff me or even act harshly. We just talked.

“How long have you been on your own?” He started sitting down on one side of the table.

“How did you know?” I asked,

“What kind of parents let their child wander the streets at night?”

“No,” I said quickly, knowing already what he wanted to do, “I don’t need anyone, I’m fine on my own.” I pulled my hoodie a little closer around my face and brushed some of my black hair out of my eyes. I used to have caramel colored hair and lively green eyes, but dying damaged my looks. My hair turned black and my eyes faded to gray. I lost whatever tan I had and my skin became as white as chalk.

“We have to find you a home,” He said, stubborn as all of the cops, “We can at least take you to an orphanage.”

I groaned and rolled my eyes. “Fine,” He smiled and I ignored anything else he had to say, preferring to stay lost in my thoughts.  

My family was close. I had two brothers, one was younger and one was my twin. I was the smart one in my family. I could solve complex problems in my head without a second thought. I wanted to be a scientist. Then I got sick. No one knew what was wrong with me. I had a constant fever and I slowly stopped eating. I slept constantly and never left my bed. After weeks of this, I knew I was dying. I still remember my last conversation with my mom.

“I think I’m going to die,” I croaked, hardly able to attain the air to talk.

“I know dear.” my mom said hugging me tight to her chest. “I’m so sorry.” Tears slipped from her face, but I couldn’t gather the strength to wipe them off. I shivered, my body aching from the sickness.

“D-d-don’t cry… mom.” I struggled to say, “I… I’ll be okay.” She leaned over the bed and pulled something off the floor. A hoodie, the one I asked for before I got sick, it black with little spots of white. As she put it on me, knowing full well I couldn’t do it alone, I noticed it had my name hand sewed on the front.

“It’s time to say goodbye,” My mom said louder, to my family waiting outside. My brothers entered first. Tommy, who was only three ran over to me hugging me tightly.

“They said you have to leave,” He cried, “Please don’t leave sis. Stay with us.” I laughed a little before starting to wheeze. Next, was Alex my twin. Unlike Tommy, he knew what was happening. He dropped down beside my bed and put his forehead on my stomach.

“April…” His words broke, thick with his tears, “I… I’m going to miss you s-s-so much.” His eyes met mine and I noticed he hadn’t slept in awhile. “Life will never be the same without you.” I gasped, trying to find the air to speak.

“I love you, Alex,” I said slowly, “Know that no matter what, I loved you.” He stroked my hair gently, and I felt I could no longer speak.

My father entered the room and I saw he had a rose in his hand. The thorns were cut off and I knew it was from his prized collection. He placed it on my chest and I studied the crimson folds. I felt my father's ragged breath and knew he had been crying. We’ve all been crying for so long. I wrapped my hands around the rose’s stem and saw him smile. I shut my eyes, sleep seemed so close, yet so terrifying. I felt one of my hands leave the stem of the rose and a smooth warm hand grasped mine.

“Don’t be afraid,” I struggled to force my eyes open and saw Alex’s. “Just let go. You’ve been through enough. It’s okay.” His voice soothed me and I felt my grasp on reality slipping. My pain faded and I felt a sudden burst of strength. Enough to say one last thing.

“See you on the other side, Alex.”

“April?” The cop asked waving his hand in front of my face, “You spaced out there for a moment.” I smiled pretending nothing was wrong. Tears brimmed in my eyes, but I wouldn’t let myself cry. Even if I don’t have emotions now I remember the emotions from when I was alive. I remember the pain, the loss, and the joy. I took a deep breath and thought of Alex. He’s the only thing that keeps me sane now. His memory latches me to the Earth, keeps me from floating into insanity.

“I’m okay,” I said and the man’s radio buzzed. I didn’t pay close attention, not really caring what they decide to do with me.

“It seems you’re all clear,” He said and stood up to open the door. I walked out of the station before he could say anything, not wanting to stick around and hear his voice. I used to like people, but now the only person I care for is Alex, and he thinks I’m dead.

I guess I am in a way though, dead. I don’t have normal vitals like humans. I breathe to look normal, but I don’t need the air. My heart doesn’t beat, I’m not sure if my brain does anything, I’ve never been tested, and my skin is cold.

“Hey girl!” A man on the street said. As soon as I looked at him I knew his name, when he was going to die, and how he was supposed to die, “Wanna newspaper?” I shook my head. Nothing in this world interested me other than making sure the path is follow.

A sharp pain made me look up. The man, Todd, had thrown a newspaper at me anyway. I glared at him and picked it up. It was the local newspaper. I flipped it over and read the bold headline on the front.

Alex Noble Wins Nationwide Writing Competition

Alex Noble, 31, won a nationwide writing competition with his heartfelt story about his sister who died as a teenager. She apparently got an unknown disease and slowly died. Here is a paragraph from his story.

“I remember her slowly losing touch with the outside world. She stopped going outside to play with me and instead slept all day. She neglected her need to eat and soon became just skin and bones. As twins, we did everything together. Losing her was like losing half of myself.”

He won $25,000 and plans to use that money to better his family and send his younger brother, Tommy, to college.

I stopped reading at that point feeling a warm glow rise up in my stomach. I shook my head, happiness isn’t allowed. I glanced back down spotting a date for a conference with him. Maybe I should just check on him. Then I’d leave. The date was set for today, tonight. I looked quickly at the location and set off for the place he chose, the park.

The park was right behind where my house was. Every night Alex and I used to run outside and play soccer. We had silly dreams about going to soccer championships together. As we got older we got more competitive, but every day ended with us collapsed in the grass in laughter. We never left each other's side and our arguments never lasted longer than a few minutes. I never thought something like this would happen to me.

I’m not even sure how this happened to me. I remember being aware of what was happening around me after I died. I knew what my purpose was just not why. Why I was here? Why I wasn’t dead? Why did I felt walls surrounding me? I fluttered my eyes open only to see nothing. My arms were crossed against my chest and I couldn’t uncross them or my hands would slam against the ceiling. I was in a coffin.

Despite my fear, my heart wasn’t racing. I simply wanted to get out. I felt strength, unlike anything I’d ever known and slammed my hand into the coffin ceiling. Dirt poured over my face and I struggled to get my head over the ground. I pushed my hands up through the ground until I felt cold air rushing across them. Grass tickled my fingers as I pulled myself out of the ground. Slowly I reburied the hole knowing full well my family thought I was gone. I looked at my tombstone, tracing the letters of my name in the cold stone. Why did I come back? Why was this job for me? I stood up blocking out the emotions racing through me. Without a second thought, I was numb, I couldn’t feel a thing. I stood, my legs stronger than ever before. I had work to do.

The warm air around me was comforting as I walked through the crowded park. Many people were gathered around the simple stage with cameras and chairs. I leaned against a nearby tree instead. My hood fell over my eyes and breathed deeply before looking up. Alex walked onto the stage holding both a woman's and little girl’s hand. His family, I smiled seeing him happy. He walked up to the microphone and picked it up gently.

“Hello everyone,” I winced at his heartbreakingly familiar voice, “Thank you for coming. It means the world to me that so many people gathered here just for my sister. She was my entire world and still is. Every day I put fresh flowers on her grave, everyday I miss her, and everyday I wish she could have become the scientist I know she wanted to be.” He droned on for five minutes, then ten, then thirty. Liquid fell down my face and I looked up expecting rain. The sky was a clear beautiful blue. I was crying, I felt a slight twinge of emotion. Something that made me more human.

I turned away, I had a job to do and I couldn’t be emotional. Walking out of the park I saw I wasn’t the only one crying. Everywhere people were crying, sad for the poor boy who lost his sister. What about the sister who lost everything? What about me? I sat on a bench nearby, my head in my hands. Is this what’s left for me? Is this the rest of my life? I sobbed my back heaving as air rushed in and out.

“Hey,” A man sat on the bench next to me, “Too much for you?” He asked and I nodded, “Yeah I know how you feel. That’s actually my brother up there. I don’t know how he has the strength to talk about our sister. Even though I was only three after she died my mother started drinking. I miss her so much.”

“Tommy?” I barely recognized him, his hair had turned a dark brown and his eyes were like two little emeralds.

“You know me?” He asked his eyebrows raised.

“No, no I don’t” I quickly stood up and walked away. I could never see him again.

The night brought rain, heavy and cold, pounding on my shoulders. I never needed to sleep so for the rest of the night I wandered aimlessly through the streets. The sidewalk turned darker from the rain, matching my mood, dampened. I had felt my emotions return for the first time in years yet I ran away.

“Hey,” I looked up to see eyes as green as mine used to be, “I was just walking home. Want to walk with me? I have an umbrella.” Alex was standing on the corner of the street. He smiled a childish and I felt tears threaten to spill. I shook my head pulling my hoodie closer over my face. He walked alongside me pretending I hadn’t said no. “My sister wanted a hoodie like that before she died.” I walked a bit faster trying to get away, but his legs were far longer than mine.

“You’re so annoying sometimes Alex! I bet you can’t even kick the soccer ball into the net!” I shouted the insult I always said to him when I was alive. His eyes widened and I quickly covered my mouth. I ran using all the extra strength I had and hid until daylight. Alex walked around the streets after calling his wife and saying he found an orphan girl alone on the streets. He wouldn’t give up, no matter how long it takes. I’d have to come out. I’d have to show him I’m real.